In the last 24 hours I have learned how a dual-winding system works in a modern alarm clock. I have also mastered the finer points of expanding versus non-expanding text on my web site. Oh and how to set the timer on my oven to come on, cook the food and turn itself off again.

When I started the week, I had no ambition to learn any of those things. In fact, there were several other things I really would have liked to master – like how to play a full twelfth of the A flat major scale on my trumpet without looking at the book. Or how to not bite when my eldest daughter complains that her little sister won’t play with her at 06:15 in the morning.

And it’s not the first time these lessons have been thrust upon me. It seems that my attention and consequently my time is more often grabbed by a piece of technology waiting to be understood than by some really important human thing.

Where do I put the soap?

I love a gadget as much as the next man but why does it leave me cold when I get mail about the new version of this or that or when a friend of mine thrusts their new pda (pdf?) under my nose for approval (there could be some jealousy at play there of course).

There are 22 objects on my desk; 7 of them need electricity and an operating manual. I would like to direct my attention, and that of anyone else who will listen, towards getting the really important stuff right. Learning the tricky business of being really good at being human, a little more of my waking hours. I want to concentrate more on repairing family relationships and less on learning how to Twitter. I want to become a better beekeeper and not quite so good at doing things on the web. I want to learn my Uranus from my Andromeda and not my bits from my Bytes.

Technology is super but there are more challenging things for humans to do than to learn how to get to levels 6 of Left 4 Dead (although the accompanying music ‘Te quiero Putta’ by Rammstein is quite a foot tapper – but for heaven’s sake don’t play it in front of your Spanish-speaking elder relatives). Come to think of it, about the best thing technology has to offer us is unprecedented access to all the music there is out there! Crikey. What a thought.

I take it all back.

Technology is the best. I love it.

Except anything that doesn’t make a nice sound – and that you can keep.

Everyone wants to know how to motivate their people to perform better in the current climate. It’s a pity they weren’t as interested before – had they been they would have been in better shape right now. What they should be doing now is no different to what they should have been doing originally, only now, it’s not really optional.

In brief – there’s more to each of these than meets the eye, BTW, so think before you dismiss ; ‘ )

Exceptional performance in tough times – what does it take?

The boss needs to know these few things:

1.    What is the No.1 preoccupation of each individual who works for me – ‘insights’ that start with “I think…” don’t count.
2.    If my people were unpaid volunteers what would I need to do to keep them? Am I doing it right now?
3.    Do I tend to clear the way or get in the way? How?

The report needs to know these few things:

1.    What frightens me?
2.    What feeds me?
3.    How to get through to the boss

• The report with their own people needs to know all those things.
• The boss and report both need to be prepared to act on what they know or to work at why they won’t.

Does it really exist?

Waiting for the hot water to come through in my hotel room. First a trickle, then a sputter, then nothing, then lots of gurgling, a breathy hiss, another trickle then final silence. Replace water for action and the hissing for talking and you have what mosty happens when companies employ consultants to help them to ‘team build‘ in the name of ‘doing management development’. Management development is a sticky business to begin with since most organisations don’t seem to want managers at all – especially now. They want thrusting, brave, articulate, sensitive, tough, creative, steady, ‘business-aware’ gods who can save the day. If that sounds batty, try getting a whole collection of these unicorns together in the same room (you’ll find them in any branch of Woolworths between the packets of Hen’s Teeth and the Fairy Wings).

The reality (according to me): team-building is to improving corporate performance what trying-for-a-baby is for family expansion. Have you ever ‘tried for a baby’? It’s horrible and the very act of trying kills much of the will to undertake the act that results in the conception of said baby. Why not just do the right things, naturally and the baby will come (IVF cases aside – apologies if you are one of those, of course).

So… If you want to build a team out of a group of individuals be very clear about what you are hoping for. It may be, for example, that if you just want people to talk to each other more, or relate to one another more warmly that you can do that for yourself and spend the money that you had earmarked for some sort of rope and barrel swinging exercise in the Dales to buying your team lunch somewhere once a month.

Bottom line: (does anyone else still say that?). Be clear about what you want to achieve in building your team, explain it to yourself in behaviours, think ‘common sense’ whe it comes to making the new behaviours happen and then get them to tell you how to do it. Hey presto – that’s team-building!

If your dreams still remain unfulfilled after many attempts then you may just need someone to come in. At least then you will know what you are asking for.

But the PEC’s rules for team-building consultant shopping are thus:

1. Be specific about what you want (“I want people to stop arguing about everything in meetings”)
2. Be precise about what you want instead (“I want challenge without the nasty stuff’)
3. Be conservative (“I want everyone to like one another” – is not realistic)
4. Be sure that you know who wants what (not everyone will want what you want just because you are the the boss). Check for REAL buy-in as you go along.

Good luck